Thursday, July 31, 2008

Looking back

My friend just told me of her friend’s first experiences with breastfeeding and I found myself wishing that nurses and hospitals were more educated on the matter. If you have had your child in a hospital it is very easy to see why breastfeeding is not a normal practice in America. The night Emily was born I tried to feed her, but of course she was too tired from being born. Then started the parade of nurses every two hours, “Did she eat yet?!?” “She has to eat!” Of course she wasn’t hungry yet. Breastfeeding is something mother and child has to learn how to do together maybe with the help of an experienced mother who has been there and done that. Not a 22 year old, childless nurse who has the rule memorized if the baby doesn’t nurse feed it a bottle. I had no idea what I was doing and was so worried my baby wouldn’t eat we gave her a bottle. Seeing her chug that milk down was so satisfying I can see why most moms give-up. Breastfeeding you can only see the time go by, there is no mL measurement on your breast showing it full and then empty; just our own mothering instincts. Unfortunately as a new mother the nurse’s insistence on feedings drown out the quiet whisper of our divinely appointed instincts and more often than not we relinquish to the louder noise.

My daughter took three bottles of formula total; one in the hospital and two at home in the middle of the night when I was desperate to get her to sleep longer. It was so difficult getting the formula made and warmed up while she cried and cried I finally gave in and just nursed. To me it was easier; I couldn’t stand hearing her cry because it just seemed to pierce my heart. The real motivation for my continued breastfeeding success was the advice I got from a nurse as we parted ways, “buy The Breastfeeding Book by Dr. Sears, it will tell you all you need to know about breastfeeding”. Well the day after we got home my husband was sent out to buy it, I was having such a difficult time getting started it seemed hopeless to me, but somewhere beneath the postpartum blues I felt a deep need to breastfeed my daughter. I read The Breastfeeding Book in about a week, I looked forward to late night feedings to read which fed my desire and gave me the power to overcome all the obstacles I was to face; bleeding, mastitis, a nursing strike, thrush upon thrush with more thrush, pumping at work, and even two weeks apart.

Of course there are plenty of moms out there who overcame those problems with no help other than their desire to breastfeed. Those are truly amazing moms.

1 comment:

Debbie Jones said...

You are an amazing mom. I love reading this blog. I feel like I am getting to know you all over again.